Is it me, or...

As I go about my life, I often notice trends that have actually been trends for a very long time. For example, "texting language", bothering to notice celebrity lives, and medical diagnosis, all seem to be trendy and picked up in waves.
It is not necessary to always put a "hook line" after every status update. Just because I #ranoutofthingstosay doesn't mean I #copout. If you're trying to be clever or witty, stop. Because you're overtly trying too hard. It's like watching the weird kid in class show off his double jointed hip. It's weird, quit making it worse by encouraging it.
Speaking of which, celebrity lives SUCK. I can't believe those tabloids make so much doing such an violation. Yeah, we have the constitution. And yeah, we have to exercise our rights or else we will lose them, but seriously!? How can you purchase a magazine that broadcasts a well-known movie star doesn't know who her baby-daddy is!? That's deplorable. I'm pretty sure YOU would be humiliated if I told everyone that happened to you, right? Yeah. So stop it.

And finally, trendy medical diagnosis. Is there any chance there's just a doctor, or a pharmaceutical company that's just making this shit up? Is there any way crazy-nut-cousin Leroy is just really pissed off at his life and makes bad decisions? Ohhh. I feel my blood getting tense. I have a tendency to get low blood sugar. Which really just means I get judgmental very easily. Lol. I self diagnosed that. And maybe I did make it up. I still think that's better to deal with than self diagnosing bipolar.
Anyway, I'm going back to the beach now. I'm going to try to take a picture of my latest oil pastel experiment. And not spell check this entry....#sry.

I put the "sketch" in "sketchy".

Easter Gets a Little Violent!

Living here, in Almost Mexico, TX, I've learned several Mexican traditions.  No, silly, not just tacos and burritos at every occasion, but confetti eggs!  Each year for Easter, you can just poke a thumb size hole in the bottom of your eggs, dry them out, and then dye them.  Once they're all dried out, you pour paper confetti in them and then seal them shut with a piece of tissue paper over the opening.  Cute, huh?  Brilliant?  I think so, too.

Martin got egged on the head.  Don't worry, it doesn't hurt.  

My Easter weekend rounded out nicely, and Seth and I spent the morning eating chocolate and watching the A-Team on Netflix.  I'm ok, with that.  Later that afternoon, I had obligations to go to a baby shower up in Port Aransas with a girlfriend of mine that I used to work with.  Pezzi and I met up and hit the beach, primero, claro.  Well, there we were.  Surrounded by friendly beach bums.  I was introduced to these confetti eggs and decided to have maximum fun with them.

I'm excited about bringing traditions like this back to NC.  This is how traditions travel, always, since the beginning of time.  I'd like to think I'm doing my part to spread the tradition-pollen.

We Can All Agree On Some Things.

I think since we're all here, and honest, it's good to be wasting your time learning about something that's practical.  You know, not judging models without their photoshop.  Which, by the way, is the latest most repulsive trend I've seen on the interwarbs....and I think I've seen a good amount of crap.

Anyway, so since Seth and I got married, I have been so thankful because we were showered with gifts from our family and friends.  I went to Target the other day, with gift cards in hand, and invested in a vacuum.  Prepare for the remainder of this post to be completely docile and domesticated.  (Something I've always fought.)


 I walk over to the DOMESTIC CHORE section of this store...

 And please make no mistake, I really don't enjoy 

being in an environment that encourages impulsive 

purchases.  I feel so bad watching families walk 

out of there with HAULS of JUNK that will just be a

 burden on their children to throw away after they pass.

Was that too abrasive?  I'll back off.  Either way, I found the vacuum cleaners and realized there were 3 hierarchies.

 Crap.  Pretty Crap.  and Not Really German.

 I instantly got to the Google machine and researched reviews and price matched, I'd be paying $20 too much to go ahead and purchase the Not Really German.  And, here we are, I'm going to do a full report.

I purchased the $100.00 Electrolux. ($75 or something on Amazon)

Pros: 

• Easy to maneuver.
• You can hold a gin and tonic while you vacuum your entire house, depending on how fast you drink.
• It easily comes apart the "main frame" and you can use the "brain" of the vacuum to hit your random small spaces, ie) the back of the truck, after the neighbor's dog gets off your couch, or to freak out your husband after he fell asleep to The Andy Griffith Show.
• Very simple to clean 
• It probably weighs about 2 lbs.  I think a beer is heavier.  Maybe 2.  
• And, oh yeah, it really sucks, too.  Legit- I mean, it's no industrial grade bidness you see at those sketchy car washes, but it'll definitely keep your small house cleaner than your crappy broom.

Cons:

You're cleaning.

You're not on the beach.

See? I'm cleaning the truck.  With a GnT.  NBD, G.  

We spend almost every day on or near the beach.  It's a bear keeping the sand out.

Broke the little part out and handled the back seat like a CHAMP.  No need to visit that sketchy car washing joint down the street.  I know my vacuum has never had to suck up crack rock or human fingers before.

Hope this was helpful.  If you end up buying one, let me know.  It really could be a decent investment.  

Open Relationships and A.D.D

Several of my fans have been writing me lately and I really appreciate it.  One in particular came from my good friend, Chris,  I used to work for his mom, actually....That's how we met years ago.  He asks "Hey- Lauren, I love hearing about what you have to say about things.  What do you think of Open Relationships?"

Well, I'll try to keep this short and sweet, but let me assure you- being a product of my family, my first inclination is to AVOID THE CRAP out of this question.  But oh no, I will confront my personal issues to provide you with my [researchless and completely opinion based] editorial.

What do I think about people who choose to be in a relationship that is "nonmonogamous"?  First off, the semantics really bothers me just in that statement alone.  To say NON-monogamous is to say that the idea of one partner is the "root" word...or the assumed standard.  C'mon.  That's such a Fox-News word and you should have recognized that from the get-go.  If someone wants to date around, sleep around, and just generally BE around- who am I to assign a positive or a negative judgement?  Don't put it in my face, and we're good.  Don't wear a Disney Character T-shirt, and we're good.  

Don't do this. Ever.

I mean, just because it has a TERM, or a NAME for "it", doesn't mean that "it" changes anything.  For example- A.D.D.  It's a real "disease" or a "disability". Well, whatever- but does it leave you bed-ridden?  Does it endanger your life?  No- it simply makes people channel surf, change the subject a lot, and have crazy random ideas.  It isn't good or bad.  In fact, it sounds like most of my friends.

Just like open relationships.  I'm not one to say if it's good, bad, or anything.  Just like A.D.D....and since it's all related, it all just seems to make sense.....Open Relationships are like having relationship A.D.D.  Do what you want, but don't look at me to give it a thumbs up- or down.  Because honestly?  I don't really care about what you do.  I probably won't see it, though, because I usually get weirded out and leave when I meet straight up swingers.    

I have a "Sinking" Feeling....

Well it's that time of my life again, when random occurrences combine to make one entire week of twisted moments that make me reconsider if everything on this earth is connected or not.

And I'm here to reaffirm that it is.  All connected.  Every last bit.  To some degree or another that you or I may or may not even understand.  Once I understand that and accept that as reality, I'm able to have fun with what life throws my way.  Allow me to explain.

But first, I have to go take my banana bread out of the oven.  I think it's ready!

...Just kidding- that was just a pitiful attempt to come across as more of the "Martha Stewart (Stuart?) Type" that just blogs carefree whimsical thoughts while baking bread.

I really am baking bread, though...but make no mistake: my kitchen is a wreck and I decided to play on the computer instead of clean it.  Damn it.

Anyway, I'm really eager to show this video to anyone who is willing to watch it.  Seth and I have been monitoring this sink hole in front of our house for a couple of days now.  It's getting larger each day- doubling in size, to be exact.  Don't panic, I sent in a report to our city about it.  However, our neighbor informed us that this is caused by water leaks.  I'm actually quite convinced that our water leak has caused the sub-ground (which must be a legit term) to erode and thus causing the ground to sink.  The concrete to fold like a soggy graham cracker.  Like I said- don't worry.  I'm totally monitoring the situation.  Will is currently on the scene to give us the latest...

Driving to the Beach and Finding Fun along The Way

Well, not only is Spring in the air, it's in my toes and my bicycle basket.  I can't help it- in this warm weather I can't help but to just walk out the door and find the first toy to play with.  It reminds me of being a kid again, honestly, because I remember just walking outside to stir up trouble too.  So, today the only way I could convince myself to get out of my cozy Sunday Morning Bed (Comfortable, but not quite like Monday Morning bed...that bed is vicious...) was to throw on my bathing suit and hop on the bike.  I hit the road for the beach.  My goal? pancakes.  My intentions?  genuine.  My outcome? No pancakes and a whole lot of fascinating side-stops.

In an effort to keep you, my loyal audience, interested- I'm going to cut right to the chase.  Here is a series of photos I took of my journey to the beach today.  And keep in mind- I never got my pancakes.  I had to settle for a Subway turkey club....insert dagger into my skull, please.

Just kidding, that was probably over the top.  Like when Garth Algar started talking about what he wanted to do to Benjamin.

Seth got me this awesome little quick-take-a-pic camera that isn't quite as direct to posting on FB as my phone, but it has a higher quality image and it's a lot faster to the fight, so to speak.  My phone lags a lot...does that happen to anyone else with a year old iPhone 4G?  Don't ask me what other numbers there are...In other news....Here's a bunch of my pictures- and at the end there's an "easter egg" of a video that is of this AMAZING spider I found....and keep in mind- I REALLY don't care for spiders.

I thought I could find some wildlife nearby....

Experimenting with my zoom focus...

My Rig....so I leave it out sometimes....

I found some more flowers!  This is at the Gypsy Bridge- near our house.

My view from the beach pier....Getting very busy with tourists.  I figured I'd jet.

I am NOT a photographer....

This guy was towing this huge inflatable pool with a Baja.  Photo-Op!

Ended my adventures with a swing by Johnny Jackplate's house- sure enough!  He was just coming home from San Antonio!!  

Here's my fabulous video capturing this giant spider I found.  He was moving a huge ball of CRAP by rolling it with it's rear end.  Strictly for the Discovery Channel....I expect a prime time slot by the Fall!